2009/2010

So I had a discussion with someone who asked me why I made new year's resolutions. Couldn't I just make them throughout the year? She insisted, that she made them whenever it was necessary to make them. She didn't need a certain date to come up with good resolutions. I agreed with her of course, that it was quite alright to make resolutions any old time, if that's what you want to do.

But also, why NOT make resolutions at the end of the year? Is there a reason why I shouldn't? I do slow down after Christmas and before the New Year, before I get back to business as usual. After the hustle and bustle of the Holidays, the parties, the food, and the many gifts, there really is no better time than to sit back, and let your mind wander a bit. What is it I did this past year? What good things happened to me? What bad things casted a shadow over me? And what can I do better next year?

I like a fresh start January 1st with renewed energy and this incredible joy, that I'm alive and kicking, and that I'm getting yet another chance to improve my ways, my thinking, my goals for the future. This doesn't stop me from re-thinking ideas, or changing directions, when I deem it necessary. But what better time is there to set short term, mid term, and long term goals than January 1st?

Of course, it doesn't matter at all, when you set these goals for yourself. Just keep those goals alive. Don't stop planning. There is nothing more frustrating than to be stuck in your tracks without moving forward and up, up, up!! :)

To all of you, whatever your tradition, whatever your plans, whatever your goals, I wish you success in everything you do. I wish you health, satisfaction, and happiness.

See you all next year. :)

Little lessons...

I always hoped that I would be the parent my kids trust to come to when something is wrong. Instead of confiding in their friends (which of course to a certain degree is in order and necessary, as I do think they need to have their little secrets from us parents), I hoped my children knew that it is always best to tell us, Mom and Dad, what's wrong. Well, I still do hope that this is going to be the case. The other day we got a little practice lesson in, which I'd like to share with you.

Toothless Fairy (who by the way will not be toothless for too much longer, and I'll have to be really creative and find a new name for her) came charging down the stairs, waving her arms around wildly, announcing out of breath that she went into my bathroom to brush her teeth, and realized when she walked back out that the little Magical Crystal Tree Set we had put on my dresser, was on the ground. Broken. "That's soooo weird, Mom, how did that happen?" Yes, yes, strange indeed.

I exchanged a "look" with Ogre and addressed my children,

SLF: Now children, can we agree that this set didn't just commit suicide by way of hopping off the dresser?

C1 and C2 nod.

SLF: Based on my experiences, dear children, your daddy did not throw the set off the dresser and then just walked into the living room and never told me about it. Can we agree on that too?"

Slight giggle... what a silly thought... daddy throwing down something and then not admitting to it.

SLF: Well, then, I know that I didn't throw it down. It still stood firmly on the dresser when I left earlier. No wind, no earthquake. It really leaves only two people, who might be able to explain what happened.

Both children shake their heads and insist they didn't do it.

SLF: I'd like to tell you both, that a lie about something so small is going to make me much more upset than if you told me the truth about it. I know you didn't do it on purpose, and if you told me now that it happened by accident, I will actually be proud of you for being brave and admitting to it.

TF: (bursting into tears!) I'm so sorry, Mommy. It was an accident. I was trying to reach behind it, and threw it off. I didn't mean to.

Lots of tears, big relief, hugs, kisses, apologies... after which I stressed to both children that there is nothing worse than a lie, and there is nothing better than the truth. I can help when they tell me the truth. They will always be better off with the truth. And what a great way for them to find out that these are not just words... that we actually mean it and act upon it.

I did tell them honestly (yep, gotta be truthful here too), that I can't promise I will never get angry at them for getting in trouble. After all I'm not a machine. But I love them, more than anything in the world. I need them to be safe, and I need their help with it, by always being honest with me.

Who knows what will happen when they're 14, 15, 16 years old. I don't even care to remember the kind of trouble I got in, that my parents still don't know about to this day. But I think, for now I taught them an important lesson, that hopefully helped them build some trust for the future... when the problems is not just a little crystal growing kit... but something bigger and worse.

Whoop-di-dooo... gotta love parenting. :)

Random Ramblings

1) Yes, dear Blue Eyed Boy, it is December, it's very cold outside and I insist you wear a coat! Okay, fine, you don't have to wear a hat or gloves. But you ARE wearing a coat.

2) Chocolate and marzipan, marzipan and chocolate, a perfect combination. Add to that a glass of Amaretto... bliss!!

3) Yes, dear religious person, I do celebrate Christmas. Yes, I call it Christmas and not x-mas. No, I don't celebrate the birth of anyone. I do celebrate the love of my family. :) Yes, the Christmas tree is in fact a pagan tradition. (No offense to anyone, I just get asked this very same question every year.)

4) I was asked to speak to a group of Humanists in NM, concerning Secular Sunday School. I admit I'm extremely tickled to be considered an "expert" in that field, and I'm giving this some serious thought.

5) I wrote a 50.000 word novel in the month of November!!! And I actually don't think it's crappy. Amazing, that.

6) My mommy will be here in 2 weeks. And my daddy will be so glad to have the opportunity to watch German TV in my house.

7) Knitting is knotty! :)

8) I should start making a list. I have no list... and the in-laws are asking for ideas already. Can't we all just celebrate without presents???

9) I'm going to run a half marathon in April. I'm pumped!

10) Ogre wants to have a chat. Must go now.

Happy "Season"!!!